Bumper Sticker Wisdom

Not a good idea to pursue wisdom via bumper stickers. But then again, if you just need to smile today… (thanks to Michael Duduit).

1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
2. A day without sunshine is like night.
3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
4. Half the people you know are below average.
5. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
6. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
7. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the
cheese.
8. Borrow money from a pessimist — they don’t expect it back.
9. Support bacteria — they’re the only culture some people have.
10. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
11. For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.
12. No one is listening until you make a mistake.
13. The problem with the gene pool is there is no lifeguard.
14. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
15. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
16. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand… [my personal favorite]
17. If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving isn’t for you.

Have you seen a good one?